Holy Pause: A Sacred-But-Not-Religious Wedding Ceremony

In addition to written-from-scratch, full length, bespoke wedding ceremonies, I offer a very beautiful, poetic and sacred-but-not-religious ceremony, that is full of pure hearted presence, connection, acknowledgement of the natural world, and the power of the pausing to mark our big, important milestones. This modern and unique ceremony is an entirely egalitarian, dogma and doctrine free, spiritually inclusive, LGBTQIA+ friendly ceremony that honors and exalts love and supports couples in sustaining it long term. It is also free from the usual insincere, tacky, boring or cliche wedding ceremony elements.

This ceremony script works for large scale weddings, mini-monies, micro-weddings and elopements, and I’m happy to say that it has captured many hearts along the way. This fully formed, pre-written ceremony is a fantastic option for couples who don't have the time, resources or inclination to invest in an original, custom ceremony, but who still want something non-traditional and reverential, i.e. sacred but not stuffy!

Here’s a beautiful video by Happy Camper Films featuring an elopement I did at Glen Oaks Big Sur using the same basic script.

About this ceremony one bride wrote: “Naomi was absolutely wonderful! She served as our officiant for our elopement on the cliffs of Big Sur and she was everything we could have hoped for. She was such a positive force and we found her to be so kind, open and wise. She made our elopement feel sacred, holy & truly special. The words she chose were spot on and literally lined up with us in every way. We could not have chosen a better officiant!”

This bride and I didn’t speak on the phone prior to the ceremony; we handled everything over email, and this was still the outcome. I think that this bride’s experience speaks to the beauty of this ceremony, and the impact it has on couples and their communities.

So, if you’re considering a Big Sur, Carmel Valley, Santa Cruz or Bay Area elopement, mini-money, micro-wedding or large scale wedding, know that it’s possible to have a ceremony that will feel as holy, significant and as “real” as any traditional religious ceremony would!

What past couples have said about this ceremony :

“Naomi masterfully created a sacred space for us. We are not religious, but our ceremony still held a spiritual weight. Naomi’s words were intentional, grounding, and full of love. She gave us the gift of a beautiful memory on our wedding day. We could not imagine anyone else being our guide into married life!” —Daniella, Glen Oaks Big Sur

“Naomi recently officiated my elopement in Big Sur. My husband and I wanted someone who could really capture how momentous and sacred this day was between the two of us without religious elements. I also had concerns that as it was an elopement, it would be a short ceremony of with a few kind words and boom, done, you’re married. So when we found Naomi, we knew we had found someone special, someone who could help usher us in to this new part of our life together, who could capture the gravity and importance of the day. From the moment Naomi arrived on the site, she was immediately a calming and grounding presence. We had opted to elope to make things simple, and while things were, it was still a wedding and lots of moving parts. Naomi arrived with her kind spirit and gentle voice and it was like someone had let us breathe for the first time that day. The ceremony Naomi wrote was touching and beautiful and a wonderful way to be initiated into this sacred space that my husband and I now inhabit. Her words will be with us for a lifetime. Naomi, thank you so much for everything, we will carry you and your words with us.” —Rachel, Henry Miller Library, Big Sur

“Naomi does a non religious ceremony that is spiritual and wholesome. When we got to the altar my wife and I were both surprised at how relaxed we were. Naomi has a very calming and soothing voice. It’s very obvious she has done tons of ceremonies by the way she makes everyone feel at ease. The words she used carry weight and meaning. It was amazing to hear how many people complimented her ceremony during the dinner/reception portion of our wedding. She was a total hit and a few couples even asked for her information. There were some people that were so blown away they were reciting full sentences she used. I cannot give Naomi enough praise for how she made my wife and I feel totally at ease at the altar, and for the beautiful words she used to wed my wife and I. If you’re looking for a calming and experienced officiant, you’re in the right place. Thank you so much Naomi for making our ceremony so beautiful and memorable!” —Harry, Groom, Chaminade